Scoop The Dirt

Many people think bringing up someone’s unhealthy eating habits is rude or a bad thing, the truth is if it is affecting you, your relationship or their health its a problem that SHOULD be addressed.

The hardest part of getting “fit” and staying healthy is diet. Having a healthy diet is perhaps the toughest battle millions of people worldwide (especially in America) will face. Some choose not to face the challenge and some just don’t realize the problem until it is too late. The proper way to tell your loved one or family member this holiday season that they need to loose some weight or at the least start eating healthier can bring an otherwise happy holiday season to a sudden end. It may not be easy to tell someone and get the response that you are looking for because unfortunately not everyone has the same definition of “healthy eating”, and worst yet, a lot of people do not realize that they have been in, or have just begun the downward spiral of unhealthy eating that leads to medical problems, sexual problems, and self-confidence issues. I think it is a great idea to tell someone as soon as you can about their dangerous habits. The most important thing to know is that for whatever reason they have for the way they choose to eat, is based on several issues and simply telling them about it may not be as easy as you think.

NO NO NO: What not to say and when not to say it:

Presentation is key, Your goal should be to communicate with the “eater” and not to communicate at them. Here are some simple rules that you should follow to put you, the “talker” and the eater in a position to talk about what is going on.

1. My number one rule is to NEVER talk about healthy eating when you are not eating something and the other person is. This leads the person to immediately become defensive, leading them to shut down in response to the criticism, however helpful YOU may think it is. Eating provokes a sense of enjoyment and when someone is enjoying their food and you, who are not enjoying the same food, come along and attack them or their food they have no choice but to defend themselves and their tasty eats.
2. Never ever talk to the person like you don’t double dip into that bag of Doritos now and again or that you are the picture of health. Often times the talker will unintentionally put themselves on a pedestal and the eater will ALWAYS notice this. The defensiveness will soon follow with, “I saw you eat XX last night and now you are talking to me?” or “you aren’t exactly a supermodel yourself!”
3. I would strongly advise against being passive aggressive about this (or anything else for that matter). Being anything less that direct in this scenario is a BAD idea. Do not say things like, “Are you sure you want another cookie?” or “don’t think you should slow down on the ice cream?” These are horrible questions and are not open-ended in any way…   The answer you could expect to get is, “Yes” and “Eghhh, maybe.”
4. Never compare anyone, or yourself for that matter, to someone you see on a magazine or on TV. I know that everyone knows this and its common knowledge by now, but it is VERY important to realize that just about every picture or video of anyone has just about as much pre-production and post-production work as Joan Rivers ( except they do look better). The truth is that whenever we look at someone that we are trying to “talk to”, we compare them to someone else, that’s bad because they more than likely have a long way to go before they can be the next cover model for GQ or Maxim.  My point is that if you compare them to how you want to see them you fail yourself and them instantly. You cannot compare them to anyone but themselves. Start with one or two small changes and work from there. Every person is unique and although just about anyone can have “rock hard 6-pack abs”, it takes a long time to reverse a process that they may have been working on for years.

The Lighter Side: What to say and HOW to say it.

Eating is amazing and I can tell you first hand that eating an entire bag of chips or bucket of ice cream can hit the spot. I can also tell you that it takes a long time to get in the mindset to change one’s habits.

Keep in mind that you are or have been an unhealthy eater, so for that reason you should approach the conversation as if you are BOTH in this together, and don’t just say it, mean it. When you are confronting the eater, try to be as direct as possible with using “we” not “you” statements.

• Instead of saying, “honey I think you should start eating healthier. “ say, “Honey I think we should start eating healthier,” or “George, I know I am not the picture of health here, I think we can both benefit from eating healthier.”

OK, I know this may be obvious, but naturally the talker in this situation sees the person as having a problem, when both people can be sharing the same bad habits. In the off chance that you are a healthy eater, or think you are, there are some simple statements that I often use when talking to clients or just giving advice that may help you out.

• Say, “I used to have a problem with carbs, I love bread, but it is so bad for ME (not you!)” or “one way I started to eat healthier was to take out the cheese from my omelets in the morning, I cut out 30grams of fat by not adding 4 slices of Provolone. I had no idea it only took that little change to help me start burning stored  fat instead of the calories and fat from that cheese.

NOTE: If you are not a “fitness expert, dietitian or have years of experience DO NOT give advice! Instead do some research together, after you express the issue, sit down on the computer or iPhone (wait..ATT won’t work so stick to your computer) and research some small changes you can make to work towards a healthier diet.

Tips:

1. Write down everything you eat then look up the nutritional contents over a few days and based on that information you can start to work on your diet.
2. Cut one thing out of your diet for a week or two, maybe its soda, cheese, or bread.
3. Only if you were able to cut something out and keep it out for a week or two, do it again with something else, now do that for a week or two.
4. Write down what you are eating for a few days and compare that to your first records. You should notice that you are eating healthier and by now you have lost some weight and are getting a little motivated.
5. Start exercising, since diet is the MOST important part of being healthy and perhaps the hardest we covered the beginning of that process first. If you did not make it to this point you probably won’t keep a consistent gym schedule anyways so forget it! Go back to step one until you are able to go a few weeks of cutting some “bad” stuff from your diet.
6. Start eating healthier, add some more veggies to your diet (if you haven’t already), SEEK PROFESSIONAL GUIDANCE FROM THIS POINT. When you get this far you have proven to yourself that you can stick to some changes in your diet and personal training or advise would be a great idea to get started in a more advanced routine of eating healthier and exercising.

Note:

• It is important to keep the proper amount of Protein, fiber, vitamins and other minerals coming in but most often you are getting those from other sources, for example trying to get protein from cheese is always a bad idea because of the calories and fat that comes with it.
• If you cannot completely cut out something, try to cut it in half, or change your bread intake to a healthier (low carb/fat/cal and high fiber) choice.

Check out nutritiondata.com to find out the nutritional contents in the food you are eating. Write down the food you are eating (all of it!), and start noticing exactly what your body is dealing with.

iPhone users check out the Food IQ app for an easy way to track everything you eat. Hell, if you cant use the phone to make calls (thanks ATT) you might as well use it to start eating healthier.